If I had to narrow down all that is daunting and horrific about me to a single fault, I would go with "wildly insecure."

This explains why I'll look at a fat person and mope, "Why am I so skinny?"

Or why I'll walk down two flights of stairs to another bathroom in my office building to avoid having my co-workers hear the unsettling sounds of defecation.

Or why I have a weblog.