A new magazine called NYHS (short for "New York Hot Sex" -- am I supposed to be blushing or something?) will be popping up each month in the city's Starbucks and Tower Records, bent on "[promoting] the pleasure [New York] can bring rather than the heartache."

601am linked to the story in the Daily News, but I stopped reading once I discovered their "10 Sexiest New Yorkers" article positions Susan Sarandon at the top of the list. Um, excuse the pun, but New York Hot Sex had better come again! I hate Susan Sarandon!

And I hate the word sexy. It is the most unsexy word in the English language. I would wager that "hot sex" is by far the least sexy, but alas, it is a phrase -- a very unsexy phrase at that. NYHS should have been called "New York Bend Over." Or "New York Pee On Me." Or "New York Condom-Free In 2003." Or "New York Fuck Me Now, Pussy Boy." Or "New York Fuck Me Before My Wife Comes Back From Her Pilates Class." Now that is sexy.

And what is with NYHS being placed in Starbucks? Yes, because when I think of hot, unbridled sex, I immediately think of a non-fat grande caramel macchiato. Oh man, I am popping a woody just thinking of it!

Anyway, I am sure the other NYHS is going to have a lot to say about this one.