I injured my right elbow at the gym last week. My publicist insists we spin this like Britney's busted knee or Ashlee's acid "refux" problem, but I've never been one to sugarcoat the truth. Y'all — my true fans — have stood by and stalked me through the most difficult of times, and so I feel a Missive of Near-Absolute Certainty is long overdue.

A drunken, impromptu arm wrestling match with my buddy and fellow Red Sox fan Rusty strained a tendon in my right elbow. My manager obtained some bootleg cortisone to remedy the situation, but I declined. I'm all about rest and relaxation, man. A sling, a few ice packs, some Aleve — these are the ingredients to a speedy recovery. Of course, I'll have to stay away from the gym for a week, which upset my trainer. I guess I'll just focus on abs and lower body for the next few days.

It doesn't hurt too bad, so I'm not sure if I need to see a sports doc. Shoot any advice my way.