The one time I turn on "Regis and Kelly," the hosts are chattering about transexuals and whether "boys who think they're girls" should use the women's restroom.

"I understand what it's like emotionally to feel trapped in the wrong body. I get it," said Kelly, "But if you have the old parts, you should use the old parts bathroom!"

Cue audience applause.

Thanks for the early mornin' pearl of wisdom, Kelly Lee!