Missed Connections > You threatened to kill my family - m4m - 23
Me: White guy in a blue button-down shirt this morning on the L2.
You: Black homeless guy sitting at the back of the bus. You were wearing gray sweatpants and had some luggage. You also threatened to kill my entire family.
Hmm, I guess I should be a little more specific. (I'm new to this Missed Connections thing!) I sat down across from you, initially overjoyed by the discovery of an empty seat on a typically jam-packed bus. It never occured to me that the seat might be empty for a reason; after all, it was clean, it was dry, and it wasn't in a space reserved for senior citizens or persons with disabilities. What would be the harm in allowing myself to sit?
I'm not sure when exactly it dawned on me that I had selected the most uncomfortable (socially, at least) seat on the bus. Perhaps it was when you began screaming at the top of your lungs in a language I can only describe as a tongues/ebonics hybrid. Or was it when the stench of your body odor brought tears to my eyes?
Or maybe - just maybe - it was when you looked me in the eye and vowed to hold hostage my entire family in Dupont Circle and murder each of my relatives one by one before dumping their bloody remains into the fountain.
You got off at Woodley Park and didn't say goodbye. Call me?
Comments
As always, Toby...
You're such a tease.
;-)
Posted by: jason | June 9, 2006 01:08 PM
homeless woman on the metro once asked me for money cause she was pregnant. luckily the 99 cent abortion clinic was right next to her stop.
Posted by: Jonny | June 9, 2006 01:58 PM
i wonder if it is the conn. ave guy with the burn scars who rips his hair and scalp off habitually, leaving an archipelago of pink scar tissue over his otherwise dark black skin. that guy freaks me out.
Posted by: scott | June 9, 2006 02:29 PM
What is funny is I saw that missed connection before I saw this post and thought to myself, this sounds like something Toby would write.
Posted by: carrie | June 9, 2006 02:40 PM
Ok that was some funny shit right there!
Haha Call me? Haha
Posted by: Spencer | June 9, 2006 03:22 PM
It's like a mashup of two of your favorite topics: the perils of public transportation and missed connections.
If only Brat Boy had been the person sitting in the back of the bus.
Posted by: chrisb | June 9, 2006 05:04 PM
you have an amazing sense of humor, young man, but today was one of your best!
Posted by: Jerry | June 9, 2006 10:56 PM
The good ones always get away.
Posted by: Jeffrey Dahmer | June 9, 2006 11:57 PM
So? Did he call you?
Posted by: James | June 10, 2006 03:00 PM
public transportation!? a window unit for air conditioning!? good god, man, do you live in a third world country?
TOBY SAYS: No, I'm just poor.
Posted by: matt | June 11, 2006 01:50 AM