Hang in there.

And still you call me co-dependent
Somehow you lay the blame on me

Sing it, Shirley!

I have the same thing.

My doctor told me it's because I'm getting old.

I shot him. Twice.

Oh, and sorry you're not feeling well. Want me to stop off at the CVS and pick up a ClearBlue Easy for you?

"My vision is blurry..." But is it VIVID blurry? HAR HAR HAR HAR!

Seriously, hope you feel better soon!

It sounds like you need a visit from Dr. L-O-V-E. Open wide and lemme take your temperature.

aw pookie. do you still want to go dancing tomorrow night? i need to help me get a boy ;)

Vividblurry become Visionblurry, I guess that is timely to an older guy like you, Toby.
:{)

get some friggin bed rest and stop pushing so hard.

Am I the only one reading between the lines? It gets better after two or three weeks, trust me.

Two or three weeks? My sister had morning sickness every day for all nine months of her partner's pregnancy!

Just be glad you don't have candidiasis. I'm toxic from the candida die off and the treatment can take up to ten months!
On the bright side.....LESS GAS!

Maybe you have been working out too hard at the gym lately and if you were a little run down, you caught a bug.

Make sure you are completely healthy before going back to working out, and then ease your way back into it. You may find you have lost a little muscle or so, but with muscle memory, it will all come back within a couple or weeks or so upon resuming going back to the gym.

Sick? AGAIN?!? Is it just me, or are you always sick? Maybe you need to carry around a bottle of disinfectant for when you go to the gym.

hi Toby.
You're such a good writer, that I'm surprise to see you make such a "high school" like mistake. You feel "nauseated" not "nauseous". (It's like the difference between infer and imply -- educated people don't make that mistake.) While the vernacular accepts more and more the incorrect usage you employ above, still, those in the know make the required distinction in their writing and speaking -- why settle bud?

That said, I hope you feel better, man. Best,
D.

_____________________
Usage Note: Traditional critics have insisted that nauseous is properly used only to mean "causing nausea" and that it is incorrect to use it to mean "affected with nausea," as in Roller coasters make me nauseous. In this example, nauseated is preferred by 72 percent of the Usage Panel. Curiously, though, 88 percent of the Panelists prefer using nauseating in the sentence The children looked a little green from too many candy apples and nauseating (not nauseous) rides. Since there is a lot of evidence to show that nauseous is widely used to mean "feeling sick," it appears that people use nauseous mainly in the sense in which it is considered incorrect. In its "correct" sense it is being supplanted by nauseating.

What a naseous comment.

I know it's my third comment, but it's been nearly ten days since your last blog.

Just so you know dK... you're wrong according to Merriam Webster.

Main Entry: nau·seous
Pronunciation: 'no-sh&s, 'no-zE-&s
Function: adjective
1 : causing nausea or disgust : NAUSEATING
2 : affected with nausea or disgust
- nau·seous·ly adverb
- nau·seous·ness noun
usage Those who insist that nauseous can properly be used only in sense 1 and that in sense 2 it is an error for nauseated are mistaken. Current evidence shows these facts: nauseous is most frequently used to mean physically affected with nausea, usually after a linking verb such as feel or become; figurative use is quite a bit less frequent. Use of nauseous in sense 1 is much more often figurative than literal, and this use appears to be losing ground to nauseating. Nauseated is used more widely than nauseous in sense 2.

While the dictionaries are out, I'm starting to worry about T. Do you think Rocco ate him? Or just kissed him?

and while we're on the grammar lesson for the educated, Merriam Webster also disagrees with dK's oft-debated usage of infer vs. imply. Either way, "educated" people make mistakes too... like when dK wrote "I'm surprise" instead of "I'm surprised".

Everybody shut up.

Maybe Toby finally realized how embarrassing it is to seriously consider a rather unremarkable blog like this to be apart of one's identity.

Then again, probably not.

Toby, are you dead?

My fantasy is to spread some chunky Skippy all up and down and in your guinea butt crack and chomp my way through until the peanut butter meets your chocolate love button. That is unless you've been, like, really really sick with the runs in which case I may pass on that for a while. At least until you're regular again. Just thought I'd share.

Ewww. That’s just gross.

At the risk of giving him the attention for which he clearly is just desperate, and while Toby is out on maternity leave, who wants to play “Guess This Guy’s Psychopathology” and why he thinks retarded comments like that are even mildly amusing? (Apologies to the real Retarded Community out there reading this blog.)

I’ll go first. I’m guessing he’s a fat, old, bald guy that craves attention, but has loads of self-pity and when challenged feigns indignation and will claim he is the victim.

Who’s next?

i think aaron's just jealous that he's not first in line for Toby's chocolate love button :)

There is no line of guys waiting to have a crack at Toby’s crack -- he’s happily coupled and I’m not a homewrecker, thank you.

Now let’s get back to our game, “What’s Barney B’s Damage?” Next contestant, please!

Aaron,
You're an idiot. I think you should start a blog about how much you love this stupid blog.

"Happily coupled" for sure--for this week at least. There must be some sort of high school reunion or family party for him to go to where he'll need a "significant other" to again distract from how uninteresting he is.

It's clear that "toby" isn't happy doing anything that doesn't somehow desperately grasp at some form of pseudo-celebrity. Somehow his attempts always fall short of success because of his unfortunate lack of a real personality. All of his "jokes" or puns seem stolen or borrowed and his recent re-focus on bodybuilding has produced the most boring schlock to ever come out of this boring sissy. So why comment or even read? Because it's funny to watch him squirm without a shred of irony in the vast microcosm of anonymous internet "celebrity", rattling on and on about his diet, "BF" of the hour, or his unfortunate college friends who are all predictably drunk and unsatisfied with their lives as social climbers in the very money-conscious nightlife scene of Washington, DC. I guess the real draw of this blog is the burning question as to whether "toby" will ever realize how unfortunate he is as a writer (and sometimes a person) and then keep his diary entries about protein shakes and imagined personality disorders like body dysmorphia appropriately to himself.

Living out your life on the web is really quite sad.

The only thing more sad is your constant lapping at his creatine-crusted balls.

Dear God,

I'm only too happy to be labeled Toby's number one ball-licker, even by a bipolar nutjob. Thanks!

Anyone else going to the HRC dinner tonight? Nancy Pelosi will be speaking...now there is someone's opinion I care about. See you there.

Living out your life on the web is really quite sad.

Yeah, but not nearly as sad as reading and writing a lengthy and anonymous comment on a blog you profess to hate.

Barney Buttcrack made a disgusting comment that had some humor to it.
God doesn't post on Blogs, but he does strike people dead. I pray that he strikes down the offender that bores us into a slobbery daze with extensive posts about....I would say shit, but at least shit helps plants grow, and finds it necessary to call himself God.
TOBY---PLEASE POST SOMETHING....THE COMMENTS HAVE TAKEN A LIFE OF THEIR OWN!