Having spent 17 years in one, I know a thing or two about closets
My bedroom closet is a walk-in closet in the sense that, yes, you can walk inside it, but you'll probably get stabbed in the neck by a brass coat hook, trip over a pile of DVDs, and have a bowling ball fall onto your head. (Isn't that what people in movies keep on the top shelves of their closets? Bowling balls?) In fact, it is probably the worst-designed closet space I've ever seen, but given that my "bedroom" in our previous apartment didn't have a closet at all, I'm not one to complain.
For weeks I've been meaning to organize things, but on Sunday it suddenly hit me: There is no real reason for me to hang on to those T-shirts I bought from Pacific Sunwear in 10th grade. I mean, sure, they are still perfectly good T-shirts, but they don't fit me! Same for the piles of white Hanes underwear. And those horrible department store dress shirts I wore to my college internships. Why do I still have these things? I guess it never occurred to me to throw them away. Until Sunday.
So now, finally, I have a clean closet. Albeit one with no clothes in it. But clean nonetheless.
Comments
i find cleaning, organizing and getting rid of useless shit that i keep around is a very cathartic experience. it makes me feel like i'm getting rid of useless emotional baggage too.
Posted by: s.eth | November 21, 2007 01:04 AM
You didn't really throw away perfectly good "T"s and dress shirts did you? As in the trash. Jesus. Why not give them away to someone who needs them. Goodwill, Salvation Army, or some gay-friendly charity. {Ok, the Hanes with skidmarks I can understand}. And especially with winter coming up. Shame on you, you heartless, emotionally-crippled FAGBOT. All gears and no warmth. For that someone needs to take an especially sharp push pin and pop all that pimply backne. Maybe you need a bowling ball to fall on your head to knock some GD sense into you. Oh, and I see all those Texas-sized cannisters in the corner. How much of that poison have you ingested over the years? Maybe your brain and other vital organs are just rotting away and you've lost all ability to think and act like a normal human being anymore!
Happy Thanksgiving, sweetie! :)
TOBY SAYS: Actually all of the clothes are folded and stacked in a corner of my room, and I'll be dropping them off at the donation box across the street this weekend.
Posted by: Le Chat Rouge | November 21, 2007 05:17 AM
I like your floors too.
Posted by: James in Washington (and Maine) | November 21, 2007 06:51 AM
don't donate the stuff - no one really appreciates it anyway, I mean, seriously ... I'm thinking eBay ... the 'soiled' ones, *i hear* fetch top dollar these days.
Posted by: kw | November 21, 2007 07:59 AM
I wouldn't feel bad putting old clothes in the dumpster behind my building. Homeless people dig through it anyway. There's not the same false sense of superiority, but it's a lot easier.
Posted by: Frontier Psychiatrist | November 21, 2007 09:56 AM
I can't believe nobody has noticed the 5-gallon drums of Super Bulk-Up Powder sitting on the floor on the left side of the photo... are you now bathing in it?
Posted by: Jack | November 21, 2007 11:21 AM
Ok so now I know what to get you for Christmas. I, obviously, would like a short boy. Gift wrapped, of course.
Posted by: Jamie | November 21, 2007 12:08 PM
Its wet and cold outside and i'm a little bit drunk......
i've been reading this blog (the only one i do with any regularity) on and off for 2 years now.
WHY? I guess its because your funny and clever and it makes me smile/ cringe (you know, like in 'The Office'). It does also make me a little bit jelous, a little bit glad not to be you and frequently sad and depressed. Maybe its projective identification?!?!
For sure a guilty pleasure right up there with sausage and cheese mcmuffins, Gaydar and Jurassic Park.............
Keep it coming dude
Posted by: neil | November 21, 2007 02:48 PM
Bowling is bad for your hair, so we know that's not what you use the bowling ball for. That only leaves....
Heavens.
Posted by: TED | November 21, 2007 03:14 PM
Got enough cytogainer?
Posted by: Tim | November 21, 2007 05:51 PM
Hmmm....people actually do use those show things. Cool.
Posted by: Alfonzo | November 28, 2007 03:33 PM