And for good measure, my favorite holiday parody from last year:

Posted by Toby at 03:30 PM | Permalink | Comments (12)

The only bodybuilding supplement I use is CytoGainer (aka TobyGainer). This shit is not cheap, so I'm always looking for good deals on the six-pound chocolate-flavored tubs.

I used to order from Vitamin Shoppe, but they jacked up the price, so fuck you, I'll never order from you again.

Mass Nutrition sells CytoGainer for real cheap and used to offer free shipping on orders over $199 - but now, for whatever reason, they exclude CytoGainer products from this offer. So, fuck you, too.

Amazon sells CytoGainer for $34.35. Not the best deal in the world, but until December 31, they'll take off $25 from any CytoGainer order over $79. (The discount applies to other products, too.)

I just ordered six tubs. Gotta strike while the iron's hot, people!

Posted by Toby at 01:32 AM | Permalink | Comments (15)

After hosting a brunch on Sunday that involved 20 bottles of sparkling wine, several rotations of the Jingle Dogs album, and a fully cooked but not-quite-heated glazed ham, our apartment was in desperate need of a thorough cleaning. So I came home Tuesday night, filled a spray bottle with undiluted Clorox bleach, and began scrubbing the shit out of our floor.

Five minutes later, I stumbled out of the kitchen and collapsed onto my bed with my eyes burning and my lungs feeling as if they were filled with broken glass. Apparently, one is supposed to cut each cup of bleach with a GALLON of water, which I didn't do, because NO ONE TELLS ME THESE THINGS. Oh, well. I'm not sure how many brain cells I destroyed tonight, but at least my kitchen floor is clean.

I'm surprised I haven't confused a can of Scrubbing Bubbles for hairspray or wiped my ass with a Mr. Clean Multi-Surface Wipe. Agatha should probably child-proof the cabinets or something.

Posted by Toby at 12:41 AM | Permalink | Comments (23)